Silly Randomness

Hey all, it has been a while since I last posted something up. Nothing super significant has happened lately and I have not really felt in the mood to write. I was urged to update since I had not been heard from in a while, so here it is. I have been busy with work and finding time to organize my life. One good thing that has changed has been a slow life-style change. I will admit I am a messy person, I have been for most of my life. Some might say it’s due to depression or others might say it is a learned habit. To be it has always been a kind of indicator of my feelings. I have started hanging up clothes instead of just throwing them on a desk or on the floor. I throw all my trash away and try to take it out to the dumpster in a timely manner. As for food in my room, I always take the dishes back up to the kitchen sink. (I always used to just toss them on the desk or floor and have them pile up.)

I finally feel like I am on my way to making myself feel better as a person, and to create a healthy space for me to work in. I still have trouble remembering to make my bed, and have trouble putting things back from where I got them. (Books, dvds, games, etc.) I am working on it though. One thing that has not been on the up and up has been going to the gym. It has been a couple of months since I last went. A part of me is so tired to try and I feel unmotivated most of the time, even with my mom urging us to go. Although another part is determined to lose the weight so I can start fitting in old clothes that no longer fit. Not to mention possibly losing some breast fat. Having 42G breasts is killer. I am so envious of the ladies who have B or C sized breasts, those are the perfect size. Not too big nor too small. Alas, I have had large breasts for a while.

Funny story though, I think I was probably about eight or nine years old, sitting out in the backyard on the well with my mother. She and I were chatting away. At that age you are a flat chested girl who will be a preteen in another couple of years. And I am pretty sure we started having classes about puberty and such at that time. Regardless, that day I told my mother I wanted big breasts when I became and adult. –Yeah– I sincerely have to tell you I regret those words to this day. Be careful what you wish for folks because God has a funny sense of humor and just might give you what you want, but someday you may just be wishing your younger self had never made such a silly wish.

Well that is my update for the day. I hope those of you who keep up to date on my blog enjoy the light reading. I will be try to keep updating regularly, if not feel free to nudge me again. Take care!


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